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A 26yr old female whose brain is powered by caffeine; without its main fuel source it has a working speed slower than that of a slug. That aside, she wishes she could grow a teeny weeny bit (read: a lot) taller and constantly whines about her weight. Enjoys devising novel ways to traumatise people with her bludders. Oh, and she is rather antisocial.

Every morning, when I open my eyes and stare at the ceiling, I get this sense of emptiness, then nervousness, then fear.

A new day has begun. Shit.

Outside, I can hear vehicles coming and going, buses screeching to a stop at the bus-stops, people - usually women - chatting to each other loudly in dialects and cats meowing.

What a great day. Yeah, right. Great day my arse.

People have begun a new day of their lives, and there I was, lying in bed, not doing anything, literally wasting my life away.

And questions will always pop up in my mind - What do I want? Why am I here? What shall I do next?

Questions, questions, questions - with no answers.

I do not know what I want in life. I do not have a goal. I'm not like other people of my age, who set ambitions and goals that they want to achieve, be it their careers, their marriages, right down to the number of kids they wish to have and which school their kids must study in. I do not believe in setting such goals. Why must we plan everything beforehand? Wny must we let our lives be controlled by timetables? What's the fun in living a life which is dictated by timetables?

Then there's this very zen-ish question. Why am I here? Long ago, I heard someone saying that every person, every living thing exists for a reason. Yeah, right. So why am I here? So far, the only answer I can come up with is, I'm here because I outswam 93284032948302941 sperm and reached the egg first. 'nuff said.

People have been asking me now that I'm back in Singapore, what do I plan to do next? That question never fails to leave me stumped. What do u mean what do I plan to do next? Anyone with common sense would be able to guess that I plan to get a job ASAP and work to my death so that I can pay off my debts, right? Or, do you mean what do I plan to do next in my fantasy? That's easy.

I plan to win TOTO. Yeah, this is it. My super-duper-kickarse-numero-uno plan in life is to win TOTO.

Argh. I'd better stop my ranting here and start on a new day of job search. What a shitty day.
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Le Raine
the starcity
Buddhists Do Scratch Their Heads Too
KungfuBunny
Mr Wang Says So
Expat@Large
Kurt Low
It's Raining Noodles!
Sibeh Sian


(I know the list is pathetic, but hey, I ain't called Antisocialfreak for nothin', you know.)
Irene
Junnie



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